Breakfast Optimism Returns to Columbus Kitchens

Columbus — A wave of cautious optimism is sweeping kitchens this week as dogs position themselves with practiced precision beneath the toaster, where the day’s most important opportunities tend to fall.

The under-counter watch remains the most coveted assignment in the household, requiring patience, an honest face, and the ability to make eye contact at the exact moment a sausage is at its most vulnerable.

“You don’t ask for the food,” explained a seasoned beagle. “You simply make the human aware that you would be willing to help, should anything fall. Things fall.”