Neighborhood Watch Reports a Quiet Week, With One Notable Squirrel

Columbus — The neighborhood watch filed a largely uneventful report this week, citing routine deliveries, two passing cats handled with appropriate commentary, and one squirrel that remains, officially, at large.

Members credited the calm to their tireless presence at the front window, a post maintained in shifts and at considerable personal cost to nap time. The community, they noted, sleeps soundly because someone is always watching.

“It’s a thankless job,” said one sentinel, not looking away from the glass. “But the street is safe, and that is its own reward.”